The News

 Dear Gentle Readers!

I come into a still place of process. I come sharing that I do not want to be part of the trials and tribulations, a strong soldier list as part of being in the Army of the LORD. Take me out of the game, coach (not death), but this game. This part of the process... this lesson plan...this moment. Fast-forward me to the "finish work", the "victory place", the blessed place."I don't want the trials and tribulations!!!

I know you are wondering where this is coming from.... Well.... last week, my mom got the news that she had cancer, and this week we got the news of the status. So, on Monday morning, while my mom was in Birmingham, Alabama, and I was in Washington state, my best friend and my mom went to her first oncologist appointment. I sat in the bed with my husband...praying... crying... being cool on the outside...but having a whole panic attack with an overstimulated nervous system. I went through the worst of the worst thoughts in preparation to execute an action plan. I created the most chaotic situation that my heart could handle. Yes, I am a therapist, and I know none of this is healthy, but here I am doing the opposite of what I tell my clients to do... sue me... I am human...lol! Before this information, I got the news that a good friend of mine died. Her death affected so many people, paralyzed a lot of us, and just made me think... What do I need to do with my time here on the other. Fast-forward in my still process about the friend's death, I get the news about my mom. Back to the story... So my mom calls me calmly, saying... they say I have a tumor on my uterus, and nodules on my lungs. She then gave the phone to my friend, who sneaked into the bathroom to say in a shaky voice, " Drika, it's bad! Baby, you have to come home". I am like ok, tell me what's going on (I was calm when I said it) as I had her on speaker phone with my husband next to me. She then tells me the details, and I say ok, I can't come home by Friday. Y'all, it wasn't that I couldn't come home, because Daddy had shown out financially, it was that I didn't want to come home. I want to be on the road home with my husband, enjoying the open space. Being a wife and making memories. I know that sounds selfish, but here I am allowing my only child's syndrome to speak. Yes, I am going home, but the journey is overwhelming to my soul. This was not where I wanted to be. 

If you are new here, I apologize that this is your first read. For old readers, you know your girl will spiral out of control and then come back. I call it the David complex. You know, through his psalms, he will start with praise and worship and then go into his emotions and end with praise and worship. In the words of Vivan Green... "I am on an emotional rollercoaster." But this news does not stop the reality of GOD's healing. I literally just wrote about the wait and how I want a baby... Now I am writing about trusting GOD again!!! Begging GOD for the miracle of healing my mother, at the same time healing me. Looking to write about the testimony.  I forgot to tell you that for the past month or two I have been praying for wisdom.... MAN, this is such a test of that. 

Today I prepare for my flight home, tomorrow I arrive, Friday I get the clarification and treatment plan of the news. But as this is taking place I am still asking GOD for wisdom. Wisdom on how to be a daughter in the midst of her own healing. How to ask for help when I am usually Miss. Independent. How to be present and not predict what GOD is going to do and how I should respond. This news is drawing me to watch GOD with my eyes wide open. Yep, I need the confirming signs, wonders, miracles, reminders, and insight. Because this feels different. It feels out of my control, and it hurts, because the fear of this healing leading to death is a reality. But I was reminded in my spiraling that I know several people who have survived this journey... Who have are walking testimonies of  GOD's healing power and grace... And that is my stand... GOD, if you DID it for them, you do it for my mom. Give me the wisdom to do and handle the process. 

My scripture while on this journey of process, wisdom, and trust is this: "Show me your faithful love this morning. I trust you. Show me what I should do.  I put my life in your hands."~Psalms 143:8 ERV

I am sure I am not by myself. I know someone reading this has gotten some news that has shifted them into process mode and wants to catastrophize the situation to the point you are having internal panic attacks. But let's take a deep breath and trust the process in the midst of the news. We can't predict what GOD is about to do, but we can be assured of one thing... It will bring Him glory and work somehow, some way in our favor... Though the grief my hid the victory.

Prayer: Daddy, the news has us discombobulated, overwhelmed, and overstimulated in solution focus process. We want the victory ASAP. We want the miracle right now. We need to see your hand at work and your peace at play. We want to trust you, but it is hard when the news is heartbreaking, when the emotions are filled with weight, when everyone is looking for us to be the faith carriers. We are lost, we are hurt, we are broke, we are speechless, and honestly, we don't know how to pray when it comes to this news. The reality of the results runs through our heads, and they do not look like the promise of your victory. Remind us through this journey that you are the author and finisher of everything, you have equipped us with everything we need to move forward, and this is not about us; it's about you. In Jesus Name! AMEN

As part of this news, I have rebranded myself and created a logo for this blog.  Check out @CEOtherapist22 on IG and follow me.

The Chapter of Wait

 Dear Gentel Reader!!! (Inspiration from Bridgeton)

I am writing this blog with a heavy and anxious heart. I have meditated on the following scripture:

 Psalms 130:5-6 (ERV) "I am waiting for the LORD to help me. My soul waits for him. I trust what he says. I am waiting for my LORD, like a guard waiting and waiting for the morning to come".

Psalms 143:10 (NCV) Teach me to do what you want, because you are my God. Let your good Spirit lead me on level ground.

Psalms 46:5 (AFV)God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved; God shall help her at the approach of the morning.

 Through my meditation, I feel like the Holy Spirit sat me down for a personal counseling session. In the session, my guardian angel, Jesus, and me with the Holy Spirit leading the session. The Holy Spirit looks me in my eyes and gets me together about my posture of waiting and my position of purpose. I sit there, speechless, in tears, frustrated by the reminders, mad at the truth, and overwhelmed by the idea of continuing to wait without the fruit I want, at the timing I want it. (Did you hear and see me throw that tantrum?) I did.  

Listen, this chapter of wait hurts. It has my soul meditating on my imperfections.  Trying to examine whether there was anything I missed, need to correct, or just did not do that got me here. My spirit whispers comfort,  reminding me to surrender it all at the feet of Jesus and trust the process. My flesh is fighting the process, thinking of ways to make this waiting short, coming up with ideas to produce what I want, and letting my selfishness be the guide. 

I know I am not by myself.  I'm sure this chapter has shown up multiple times in our lives, and every time, Daddy blows our minds and shows us how it worked out for our good. Then maybe weeks, months, or years later, we're back in another episode of the waiting chapter.  Going through the same emotions. Maybe this time, be a little patient with the process and ourselves. Maybe a little wiser with our ability to be still and quiet in hearing  GOD.  Maybe a little more obedient, not as many tantrums, and sprinkles of trust and surrender. 

No matter what we are waiting for, the waiting chapter is a reminder that Daddy is the author and finisher of our life story. Also, we are reminded how we will never be able to understand the process of GOD.  We can only trust it and understand that victory is the final result. 

Prayer: Daddy, the posture of waiting can be a lot as we are positioned in purpose.  Help us! Help us be still.  Help us surrender.  Help us get over us. Help us to trust the plan, process, and timing of your hand. We desire to learn from the waiting, to see it as a gift, and to realize it's temporary, not permanent.  Daddy, today we ask that you change our hearts, minds, posture, position,  and response to waiting.  

In Jesus Name. 

Amen!

Day 9 of This Is Personal (TIP) 21 Day Fast: Love Formula

 Dear Reader: Join me as we talk about the love formula and how it can be applied to our lives during this week.

This Is Personal (TIP)  is a 21-day fast and journey. During this journey, we will move from seeing the Word of GOD as a guidebook to seeing it as a space for personal encounters with GOD! We will explore three focus scriptures and create space for us to reflect and journal about: How to create our own record book with GOD,  How to move from who we are to who GOD has called us to be, and How to stand firm in the process during the difficult times.  Though the journey is individualized and personal, it allows for collective accountability and discussion. 

You can send your prayer request and answers to the homework assignments to: thisispersonaldevotional@gmail.com

Also, join us for prayer on Mondays and Thursdays during the fast:

Mondays at 6 am cst (starting January 29, 2024)

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/86178915186?pwd=Q1JKMFlpMENaeFZNaHZXLzB4QUROdz09

Meeting ID: 861 7891 5186

Passcode: TIP2124

Thursdays at 7 pm cst (starting February 1, 2024)

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/84134169890?pwd=Z2xQallweWQ4NTBnSTlZeWpXN3cydz09

Meeting ID: 841 3416 9890

Passcode: TIP2124!

***We do not own the rights to any music played during this devotional

Hebrew Boys Faith

Listen I don't know about you, but the weight of waiting has been heavy on me lately. The wait of waiting on the unanswered prayers and deepest cries of my heart desires. I was talking to my mentor about how I was feeling and how the weight of waiting was turning into depression. I found myself paralyzed and lame in the thoughts of my wait. After telling me the feelings I felt were ok my mentor hit me with a question that hurt me and arrested me at the same time. She said "Shawndrika,  what if what you have been waiting on never manifest in the earth? Will you respond with the faith of the 3 Hebrew boys...Even if He doesn't do it we still know He can?" (Daniel 3:17-18) I looked at her crazy as tears fell from my eyes to know this statement of faith could be my reality. Though I felt broken at the thought of this reality, the Holy Spirit arrested me at the same time. He reminded me that when the 3 Hebrew boys made that statement it wasn't  from a place of doubt or hopelessness but, from a place of true surrendering. They were saying to Daddy even if we don't see you manifest the situation in our favor like we want you to, you will still come through and get the glory out of  our lives. That's the key...Daddy getting the glory!! What you are praying and waiting for may not manifest or come in the package you want, however, if you surrender it to Daddy...it will manifest His glory in your life and draw you closer to Him. I hope this word and revelation reminds you that the wait is worth it! Remember the weight is there for you to surrender not to hold.

Prayer: Daddy we thank you that even in our heaviest moments you wait for us to surrender that you may get the glory out of our lives. We yield to your will today as we wait for you to manifest your glory. We take heart that what we are waiting on may not come in the package we want or the time we think we want it, however, it will come on time and work in our favor. In Jesus Name. AMEN!

I Don't Care

Hey Readers!!!

I know it's been a while and I promised once a month you would hear from me, BUT LIFE!! Those two words alone can preach a sermon that reaches nations!!! But we will talk about that one later.

 Today as I was looking at my Facebook Memories and I ran across a post that I wrote when I was transitioning from being married to dealing with my divorce, to being single again. In this season in my life, I was in a place where I was nonchalant about a lot of things, including my relationship with Daddy. We were just getting reacquainted with each other and I was in a place where everything that could happen, happened!! I was lost and I had developed an attitude and even verbiage of "I Don't Care." So, here is my confession and I hope it helps someone. We will talk more about it after you read it.

Confession: I am really in an I don't care mood. I don't know why I feel like this and I am sitting in my office trying to shake it off... But then I hear the Holy Spirit says to me  I don't care is not a bad place in the right timing... Let me say that again "I don't care is not a bad place in the right timing."(I can shout right there) I know you are saying what does that mean Shawndrika? If I am trusting GOD to be the supplier of all my needs, the lifter of my head, and I am doing my part... I don't care if I have to wait. I don't care if I have to be single until he finds me. I don't care if people don't understand my actions. I don't care if I have to cry to get through the day. I don't care if my communication with GOD causes me to miss moments that others think are important. I don't care if I have to sow, separate myself, or even endure until He comes. I don't care if I have to be silent while people talk about me. I don't care if it hurts now, my Daddy will heal me later. I DON'T CARE!!! When you get to a place where you Don't Care in the right timing then you will realize the freedom in trusting the Father. Learn how to not care in the right manner and watch GOD turn things around. #notcaringwiththerightspririt #idontcareaboutthecost #itsworthit

Whew!!! Were you blessed by that? I know I was!!! It reminded me again the energy we put in caring about things that we can't control, out of our control, and beyond our control. It also reminded me that there are times in our lives where we put so much energy in caring about people, situations, and circumstances, that we miss Daddy caring for us. (Oh, someone is going to get that in a minute) we care so much about the next that we can't enjoy the now. Today do me a favor get you a healthy "I Don't Care," attitude and let Daddy care for you.

Prayer: Daddy, help us have an "I Don't Care" attitude when comes to things that you are taking care of. Let us gain more access to you as we "Don't Care," for the things of this world or the things people say about us. Help to Don't Care for the things you don't care about... Like sin, idols, and being disobedient. Thank you, Daddy, that we "Don't Care" in a healthy way! In Jesus Name. AMEN!

HeartBroken

Hey Readers,

I know it's been a while, but I have been in an unmotivated funk. No reason on the why, but just have. But this past weekend a statement was made that blew my funk out the water. "GOD will break your heart to blow your mind."

What do you do when Daddy breaks your heart to blow your mind? Well, with a heart of thanksgiving you tell Him thank you. I am sure that the statement alone has some of you all confused. Why would Daddy break my heart, when He told me that He would give me my heart desires? (Ps 37:4) Well, can we quickly (and I do mean quickly) examine that scripture? When Daddy talks about giving you your heart desires here, we must examine the three verses prior. It says that we must delight ourselves in Daddy. When we delight ourselves in Him then, He will give us the desires of our heart. But we get the desires of our heart because they are actually His heart desires for us. Which brings me back to the statement that I said at the beginning of the blog that shook my world. "Daddy will break your heart to blow your mind."

I know you wondering why did this statement shake you so much? Well, it's because a lot of times we see Daddy's no as a punishment, as an indication that we are not doing something right or we did something wrong. But, in reality, His no, is His way of telling us what you are asking for is not big enough for me to give you. That I need to break your heart, so your mind can be blown by the thoughts I have towards you. That you need to realize that you aren't thinking my heart desires for you. That you are not connected to me like I need you to be. This what this statement is saying. Daddy is telling us to be bold enough and have so much faith that we are willing to trust Him to break our hearts so, I can blow our minds. WHEW!!! That was a lot to tell and take in, but it was worth it.

We must shift our hearts and minds when it comes to Daddy. We can't be content in our thinking, or even our heart desires that we miss Him. Daddy wants the best for us, and though we are thinking best, bigger, and greater for ourselves, Daddy feels as though we can go deeper and bigger.  Today, do me a favor... Let Daddy break your heart so, he can blow your mind!!

Prayer: Daddy, break our hearts, that our minds can be blown by your grace, favor, love, joy, and peace. Break us so we can be in a position to desire more of you and last of us. Break us, that we may be a testimony of your love towards us. Break us that we may enjoy life more abundantly here on earth. Break us, so we can see you. In JESUS Name! AMEN!!!

Pick Me Up In The Spirit

So, the other day I was strolling through Instagram and I came upon this post that stated: "Check on your strong friends".  I don't know about you, but that statement hit a string in my spirit. Why? Because I am "The" strong friend. I am the friend that wakes up and prays in the middle of the night with you. The friend that you can lean on. The friend that is pushing, motivating and encouraging you to get to your next. I am "The Strong Friend".  After seeing that post I had some thoughts come to my head. Well, technically the thoughts came after an emotion I had about two people I consider to be my best friends made me feel some kind of way. I have embarked on a new journey in my life that requires more than what I expected to give, honestly. This journey has caused me to be busier, but not busy at the same time.  (I know that sounds confusing...let me see if I can explain it better) It has caused me to be in a position of being on call with some flexibility. But, this doesn't mean that I did not or don't have time for my friends. After looking at pictures of them having fun on the weekend, it made me realize that these people that I have labeled best friends to the point to call them sister and brother, don't pick me up in the spirit like I do them. They aren't in tune with me like I am with them, and that made me really upset. Because, when they need me I am there, whether they verbally express it or I pick it up in my spirit.

Me having these feelings lead to a conversation I had with my little sister when I told her that my desire in this season is for someone, anyone in my circle to just pick me up in the spirit. I just want one person to say" I am praying for you. I am proud of you. Thank you for being a friend". Something!! Then I was reminded of a scripture found in Philippians 4:14 " Yet it was kind of you to share my trouble".  (ESV) That scripture really spoke my heart. It caused me to be in a place where I had to evaluate my friends and even myself. Am I the friend that picks her friends up in the spirit? When I do, do I act in a way to cover them? Protect them? Heck, call and check on them? The answer to the last two questions is no. Why? I really can't tell you the why behind it. But, what I can tell you is that I am striving to do better and have apologized to those that I have dropped after picking them up in the spirit.

Today, I want to challenge us to not only desire friends that pick us up in the spirit. But, to actually be the friend that executes the actions after we pick friends up in the spirit.

Prayer:  Daddy, thank you for building us to carry the weight of your Spirit in us. Thank you for allowing us to be in a position that we can pick up our friends. And that You have surrounded us with people that can pick us in the spirit as well. Daddy, help us be bold enough to act on the picking up. Help us be able to not only pick them up but actually call and check on them. Help us to be consistent in our check-ins and helps us maintain a connection that we can pick them up as often as needed. In Jesus name!!! AMEN!!!

P.S. Day 2 of #bloglikecrazy completed!!! Thank you for reading and coming on this journey with me.

Birthday Behavior

Hello Readers!!!

I know, I know!!! I haven't posted in two weeks!! But, can I be honest I haven't had the energy and know how to post, what you need in order to be in encouraged. So, I had to get my life and pray about what I needed to share with you.

So, today is a special day. I didn't want to release this blog on Tuesday as usual because I wanted you to be a part of my birthday celebration. Yes, today is my birthday and I am super excited about it. Every year for the last 6 years I have always been in a funk when it is time for my birthday countdown. I would find myself comparing where I should be to where I am. I would think about all that I lost. My areas of lack. My areas of fear and frustration. Anything negative, I thought about it as my birthday approached. But, this year was different I don't know what happened or when it happened. (That's usually how Daddy works. He will shift you and transition into your next without you  being fully aware of the shift or the transition).

Today is not your usual blog.  It is a blog filled with revelation and insight. One to encourage you to enjoy life in spite of! This blog is to bring you more aware of what is going on with you. What Daddy wants to do through you. How you can live the abundant life that Jesus talks about in John 10:10

Let's get started!!!

As I prepared for today I decided to do three things. 1. Reflect. Not on what I wanted and needed. Not on what I did not have. But, reflect on the fact that I did not look like what I had been through. I start to look at pictures from the last 6 years. I saw how I lost and gain weight. I saw how my mask sometimes showed, but no one confronted me about it. I saw how I pushed through despite feeling like life was not even worth living. 2. Realize. I came to the realization that who I am will never be who everyone needed me to be. I will not be able to please everyone, fit there mode, or even be accepted by everyone. Last 3. Revelation. I got the revelation that I have not lived up to my full potential. That I have allowed myself to become complacent, fearful, and doubtful. I found myself comparing myself to people I thought I wanted to be, instead of asking Daddy what He needed me to be.

Through these decisions, five things were birth out of me. 1. Concentration. I realize that I need to focus on what is in front of me. Learn from what is behind me. Prepare for what is ahead of me.  By doing these things I will be able to be productive. 2. Consistent. When you create a routine that works keep working it. Keep building on it. Having foundation is the key to success and consistency is the cornerstone. Daddy is consistent, and because we are made in His image we must be the same. 3. Courage. You must be bold enough to think outside your box. To be in a position where you are willing to say "Yes," in spite of the test. Your "Yes", can't be compromised due to your discomfort. Which brings me to the fourth thing...4. Comfort. You must become comfortable being uncomfortable. See the more you get used to being uncomfortable the more you get shifted and transited into your next. Last but not least 5. Completion. This one is hard because I am so goal oriented that I felt like this referred to my assignment and not me as a person. But, this completion is about being whole. It's about realizing that what you thought you needed was not what you really needed. It's about being ok with you despite your flaws. It's the summary of everything I have discussed with you so far.

So, I am sure you are wondering how can all this information help you out. What can you do with this information? Simple. Use it. Look and see what you need to work on in the three decisions. What decisions do you need to make that you haven't made? What decisions do you need to re-evaluate? The five things birth out of me... Well, those or my tools, revelations, elements of life. They are the things that I need for this next chapter. They can be some or all that you need in your current journey.

Today, I challenge you to use my birthday to create a new year for you. No, not a new you, a new year. We are always waiting for January 1 for us to start all over. But, the reality is, our new year starts every time we open our eyes and breathe the breath of life.

Prayer: Daddy, we thank you for this moment. The moment to breathe, your breath of life. The moment to really get somethings straight in our lives. We thank you for the ability to point out the things we need to deal with. The thing that we need to evaluate and make decisions about in our lives. We realize we do not have time to waste, and we must stay in tune with you. Thank you for your guidance through your Holy Spirit. This moment could not be productive without your Holy Spirit. In JESUS name! AMEN!

An Excused Yes

Today's blog is about to challenge your YES!

This past Sunday my pastor talked about Moses and the excuses he made when he said yes to Daddy.  Let me give you a summarization of this story so you can be brought up to speed for those that aren't familiar with the story.  Ok, so Moses was saved by his mother during a time where the Pharaoh was trying to kill all the Israelite boys. He grew up in the house of Pharaoh, killed a man, ran away, and met his real family, and this is where our story picks up. Moses is with his people minding his own business when Daddy tells him that he will be the one that approaches Pharaoh. Daddy tells him that he will tell Pharaoh  " to let His people go". Well, Moses response to this prestige opportunity is one I think most of us do when Daddy tells us we are going to do something great in the earth...The of  (drum roll please)... The excuse. Yep, that's right the excuse. 

We will give Daddy a, yes, but somehow, someway we end up finding an excuse on why we aren't capable. In Moses' case, his was the inability to speak with clarity. He said in Exodus 4:10-14:

10 Moses said to the Lord, “Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.”11 The Lord said to him, “Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord? 12 Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.”13 But Moses said, “Pardon your servant, Lord. Please send someone else.”14 Then the Lord’s anger burned against Moses and he said, “What about your brother, Aaron the Levite? I know he can speak well. He is already on his way to meet you, and he will be glad to see you.  (NIV)

10 Moses raised another objection to God: “Master, please, I don’t talk well. I’ve never been good with words, neither before nor after you spoke to me. I stutter and stammer.”11-12 God said, “And who do you think made the human mouth? And who makes some mute, some deaf, some sighted, some blind? Isn’t it I, God? So, get going. I’ll be right there with you—with your mouth! I’ll be right there to teach you what to say.”13 He said, “Oh, Master, please! Send somebody else!”14-17 God got angry with Moses: “Don’t you have a brother, Aaron the Levite? He’s good with words, I know he is. He speaks very well. In fact, at this very moment, he’s on his way to meet you. When he sees you he’s going to be glad. You’ll speak to him and tell him what to say. I’ll be right there with you as you speak and with him as he speaks, teaching you step by step. He will speak to the people for you. He’ll act as your mouth, but you’ll decide what comes out of it. Now take this staff in your hand; you’ll use it to do the signs.” (Message)

So in both versions of this scripture, we see five things that happen when it comes to Moses' excused yes. 1. Moses questions Daddy. He even goes to the point where he begs Daddy not to give him the assignment. Now, Moses' begging confused me. Because in Chapter 3 (Read it for yourself) he had an intimate encourage with Daddy that literally caused a shift in his life. But, now at this moment, he is questioning the assignment. Is that not how some of us are. We have an awesome encounter with Daddy. I mean it is a life-changing moment. Yet here we are moments later, questioning Daddy's request of us saying yes to the assignment that He called us to. 2. Moses was quick to point out his unequipped ways. He reminded GOD that he was not able to complete the assignment, due to the fact that he did not have the equipment to do so. But, I love Daddy's response... He told Moses that He would go with him. He reminded Moses how was the creator of all things and the same thing that made Moses unequipped He would equip. But, just like some of us Moses told Daddy that was good enough. Let me take a sidebar here and say this... There is nothing Daddy can't offer that is not good enough. Daddy's presence is more than enough!! If we become comfortable with Him, then, we can become comfortable with the things that He calls us to. Back to the points. 3. We see the grace of Daddy. Daddy got mad that Moses clearly told Him that His presence was not good enough for him to complete the assignment. Daddy is so great to us! Because even in his anger He graces us with His love and comfort. Which brings me to point 4. Daddy did not agree with Moses excuse, but he did understand that he needed comfort. Instead of giving him a way of escape He equipped Moses with another tool...his brother Aaron. Another sidebar: Daddy will make sure that you have no excuses to completing the assignment. You can tell him what you lack and He will create the equipment to meet the need. 5. I love how Daddy still told Moses, (summary) "Even though you have your brother to speak for you, he can't speak unless you open your mouth." Last sidebar: Even when Daddy provides you with the equipment to complete the assignment it will not work until you do your part.

 So, what's the moral of this blog? No matter how many excuses you give Daddy, He will always equip you to complete the assignment. But, He will make sure you work so you can see the potential that is in you. He will make sure that you conquer that which was once an excuse. Daddy will make your excuse your GOD testimony

Prayer: Daddy, thank you that no matter how unequipped we feel, you are waiting and able to provide us with the tools we need to complete the assignments.  Daddy, help us to understand that what we see as an excuse is actually an opportunity for you to get the glory. Thank you that where we are weak your strength will make us strong. In JESUS name! Amen

I am Over It

Daddy, I am over it! The heartache, the frustration, the cycles, the relationships, the rollercoaster ride of emotions, the debt, the worry, the stress, the fear, the disappointment, the failures, setbacks, and setups. I AM OVER IT!!!
This is the conversation that I had a few days ago with Daddy as I sat in my living room crying and stressing over the bill collectors calling me, worrying about how I am going to pay, this and that. This is the mindset I had when I thought about the investment I poured into so many relationships and friendships. This is even the mindset I had when it came to church too. I was OVER IT!!!

Have you ever been there? To the point, you were over everything that affected your life in such a negative way? I mean to the point you even contemplated taking your life? Well, that was me. Yep, this is a transparent moment. One that I think plenty people have but are ashamed to admit. I mean who wants to be in the position of showing that they trust GOD and then turning around and saying life is not worth living anymore?

This is probably going to be a real transparent moment for me because I have not told anyone, but you, my readers this.  I have been keeping these things bottled, masked, and hidden. I mean I am a licensed therapist and minister, how does it sound and look for me to be speaking or thinking suicidal thoughts? But, there I was only a week ago in my living room trying to Netflix and chill and these were my thoughts.

But, guess what? The same things that I just told Daddy that I was over, are the same things that He was trying to use to get me to my next. UGH!! Don't you hate it when Daddy uses the things you hate to get you to your next? How He uses issues, situations, circumstances, and failure to show you how to grow. To birth out new assignments, ideas, and gifts? How He takes your constant complaining and creates a moment for you to experience His glory and presence?

I hate it, but it's in those same moments that I realize how much GOD is  I AM! I AM is over it, and I AM is in it. He takes over and uses His strength to create new beginnings for us to be in Him and over IT ... The IT is us. We are the IT!!! I mean the IT is our.....will, word, and way.  It is our ability and desires to want to operate in our strength, mindset, and emotions.

But how do we get over the IT? By allowing Daddy to be it. I was reminded of the game tag. How the object of the game when being IT, is to tag as many people as you can before they get to the base. That's what Daddy wants to do. He wants to tag as many of your problems before they get to the base of your mind and you feel defeated instead of victorious.  That's why I John 5:4 says "for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith".
So today do me a favor join me in playing a game of tag. Let your problems run but allow Daddy to be IT!

Prayer: Daddy, thank you that you have already told us that you will handle all that concerns us. We thank you that even when it seems like our problems are weighing us down to the point we want to give up on life, we will tag you and allow you to be it. You are the source of our strength and everything that we need to get through every moment of our lives. We thank you for being IT. In JESUS name. Amen!

The Friction of Wind

So today while at prayer Daddy revealed to me the purpose of wind. No it's not just to circulate the pollen in the air or keep us cool. The wind at its greatest speed will cause a great friction to occur that will cause things that were hidden or unknown to be revealed. Don't believe me? Let me give you scripture to back it up. Mark4:38-41
³⁸ Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and said to him, “Teacher, don’t you care if we drown?”
³⁹ He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Quiet! Be still!” Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.
⁴⁰ He said to his disciples, “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?”
⁴¹ They were terrified and asked each other, “Who is this? Even the wind and the waves obey him!”

Now I know you are saying what did the wind reveal in these verses? Well something great actually. Let's examine each verse to see how the wind revealed some great things starting with 38. In verse 38 we see two things that were revealed. The comfort, peace, and calmness of Jesus and the doubt of the disciples. Verse 39 we see the authority of Christ and the obedience of the wind. Verse 40 reveals the hearts of the disciples, their lack of faith, and dare I say it religious mindset. Ok let me pause because someone might get offended. But let me say this. These men had seen Jesus heal the sick, raise the dead, feed 5,000 with 2 fish and 5 loaves of bread with leftovers, and never went without anything. Yet they did not feel that Jesus the one that did all of this, could not save them from the strength of a might wind? This is the mindset of some believers (me included) if it's a great thing Daddy can do it but he does not specialize in the minor. WRONG!!! He specializes in all things concerning his children whether it is corporately or individually. Minor or Major. Religion in the sense I am talking about, is doing the action without the relationship. Or in disciples case seeing the work and going through the motions of following without realizing the work, works for them. I  know that sounds  heavy (in the words of my sister) so let me break this down in simple terms. That's like getting saved but not realizing it comes with benefits for the here and now. That's like having bluetooth capabilities and still holding the phone because you are not use to the accessibility that the bluetooth gives you. I hope you get it. So in summary, the disciples had access to Jesus and knew with him that miracle, signs, and wonders would happen but they forgot that it applied to them as well.... That's religion.... Ok, lets examine the last and final verse...Verse 41, which revealed three things... 1. That the disciples had allow the spirit of fear to consume them so much that even after Jesus gave them peace, they were still doubtful. 2. The disciples realized the authority of Jesus. 3. (Last, but not least) The disciples hearts had fail to realize who they were truly connected to. Isn't that crazy that after all that Jesus had done in these verses they were still left with questions. But that's like us, right. We ask Daddy to do something, give us a sign, or answer a prayer... He does it and we are still left questioning things about him. But I am here to tell you that the friction of the wind also creates space and opportunity for something new. Even thought verse 41 ends with a questions it also create the moment of growth that lead to so many great historical and biblical events. Events that gave us access to Daddy. So the questions now come: Are you ready for the friction of the wind in your life? Are you ready to see the heart that the wind will reveal when it comes to your relationship with Daddy? I know I am ready for the wind...it maybe painful, but it will at least create the opportunity and moment for me to passionately pursue JESUS and draw closer to Daddy.

Prayer: Daddy thank you, that though the winds in our lives may seem strong and unmanageable, we can call on the name JESUS and find peace, rest, and calmness. We thank you that it's at the name of JESUS that the winds must obey. We thank you, that we will never doubt or have little faith in the things of you Daddy.  Draw us closer to you through the winds of your glory, your peace, your grace and mercy. In Jesus Name, AMEN!

Unbothered Daddy

So I am in my office with all these thoughts going on in my head and I pick up my daily devotion calendar that is displayed on my desk just to change the date. Let me remind you I have had this calendar for years! Maybe 13 plus years. But I pick it up to read what March 21 says and this scripture has wreaked my day like literally wreak my day. Tore up my brokenness, rip my doubt, and breathe life into me. Isaiah 54:10 NIV: "Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the LORD, who has compassion on you."

I know you saying how could that one scripture wreak you like that? Well when you are in a place where you don't know if Daddy  is doing something for you and feel like things are going silent.

You wonder Daddy do you still love me? I mean to feel like Daddy are you really bothered by the things that I am bothered by or am I just praying empty prayers? Well this scripture  just ripped  those thoughts and more out my head. In one reading my heart was change and I had an awaking moment of who Daddy is. Daddy is Unbothered. That means that there is nothing I can do, this world can give, bill collectors can say, my finances can show that moves Daddy away from his covenant of peace. Ok, let me preach to myself. There is no amount of debt, issues, reports, stress, fear, anxiety, disappointment, feeling, or emotion that can shake Daddy’s love, compassion, or peace for me and towards me. Do you understand that? Daddy is so unbothered about what we are bothered about. He does not care how much the world says we have failed. Whether it be with goals we have set, debt we tried to cancel, or the lack of funds in our bank account. Daddy is unbothered with our strategies, but he is bothered that we have not sought out his peace and love, and that we have become so overwhelm with the world that we have allowed mountains and hills to block us from his presence. 

Prayer: Daddy help us to become unbothered by the things of this world, our life issues, and every strategy that we have created to get us out of whatever we have created for ourselves. Daddy help us become bothered by your love, peace, presence, word, and will for our lives. Help us become bothered by your supplication, provision, and strategy. Help us become bothered with being bothered in you. Bothered by your voice….Bothered by your assignments for our lives…Bothered by your love, healing, and just you Daddy. In Jesus Name! AMEN

Victory in Him

Good Morning Readers!!!

It's been a while since I have blogged and I do apologize I hope that my time management will be better since I have now shift into a new position, which by the way is what this blog is about. So let me see if I can tell this story as short as possible so that I can get to the meat. About 6 months ago I start getting indirectly bullied by a co-worker that has been in the field for about 20 plus years. She felt the need to tell me how to do my job to others and criticize how I get my work done. It even got to the point that she was having meetings with my direct and indirect supervisor without me. I finally got feed up and meet with her and my indirect supervisor. After the meeting, I felt like maybe somethings should ease up, but unfortunately, that was not the case and because of this stress started to cause hair loss and health problems. (Sidebar: What do you do when the enemy comes after your glory? Answer will be given later) Well of course like any other person I started to pray for instructions, answers, and directions. I got it! It was time for me go and move towards something new. It was not hard to swallow it was just hard to deal with the process of applying for jobs and not hearing anything for months. But let me tell you that GOD is Jehavoha Jira.. he will provide in his perfect timing and give you the desires of your heart. So today is my last day at a job that I have worked at for 4 years. I have learned so much, gain so many relationships, and had the honor of working with one of best friends, and it still hasn't hit me that I am leaving.   What does that have to do with Trusting the GOD in You?  All through this process, I have learned how to do one thing Proverbs 15:1 A soft answer turns away wrath. Because of my soft answers, speaking to the coworker that was bullying me, and being the example for those watching me, I learned how to trust the GOD in me. I learn that there are times GOD needs you to be the example even when you are going through, and even be a person of integrity even when you have the right to not be. To be in a position where show love when loving that person hurts. But the GOD in you says stand in trust me. Let me encourage someone right now. The enemy will present ways of escape that look like GOD's but know that the illusion of his way will always get you back to where GOD told you to be in the first place. Stand still and watch GOD not only fight your battles but make your enemies your footstool. They will know who GOD is by the time you realize that victory has already been won on your behalf.

Prayer: Daddy trusting the GOD in me has been the most difficult thing to do in this season when it seems that everyone but me is getting the desires of their heart. Help me realize that your timing for me and my life is totally perfect and if I just stand then you show my enemies what victory looks like.  Daddy help me to trust your instructions, stand on your word, listen quickly and speak slowly. Help me to remain confident in this one thing that I will see the goodness of you. In Jesus Name. AMEN!

A Daughter's Prayer

I wrote this four years ago I hope it blesses you like it blessed  me on today.

Lord teach me how to love the ones that hurt me, to forgive the ones that offend me, to pursue peace when I’m pissed; to move beyond the moment into the lifetime. Help me father to remember it’s not about me, but your kingdom. Help me to stop making temporary permanent, and please help me find words of wisdom, compassion, and understanding to give to the ones that refuse to hear my heart. Father create the atmosphere to rebuild the relationships I destroyed and rebuild me from relationships that destroyed me. Open my eyes to what you are showing me and let me not take this assignment in vain. Give me your presence that I may move at your pace, and father when I become impatient with the present task can you remind me of the future promises you have for me. Cover me father from my own ignorance and allow me to not be blinded by my own thoughts. Let me focus on your voice, walk in your faith, trust you at your word, and hold fast to your presence with the power of your love. Father I’m an available vessel waiting on your instructions and though I have a couple of cracks and there are places that I still don’t want to explore about me, hold my hand and remind me that you can use anything and anyone all we have to do is surrender to your will. In Jesus Name Amen! #teamlostforwords

The Statement

Hey blog readers it's been a while since I post something but while on facebook I ran across a memory note that bless me all over again.

The note is titled: THE STATEMENT

So in a conversation that I had with a sister on tonight she brought out something that I never thought about. So may time in our time of repentance we make the statement "GOD forgive me for the decisions that I MADE." As she was praying for me, she stated "GOD allow my sister to move past the statement I MADE, because YOU are the author and finisher of our life story." NOW maybe you didn't get the revelation of the statement, so let me break it down. SHE said that I MADE, BUT YOU ARE THE AUTHOR AND FINISHER of OUR LIFE STORY. Which means that there is no such thing as a "MADE" Decision. Ok. GOD is the creator of all, and in the word He gives us free-will, but that doesn't cancel the fact that He created the situation to the decisions that we make. These same decisions that either set us up or out. Ok. I'm sorry I'm about to lose it over here. GOD knows what decisions that we are going to make as well as the outcome of how it will play out. Let me just say this, in order to be a victor you must receive the victory of YOUR LIFE STORY!

This bless me all over again!!! I was deep before marriage..lol But the point of this is that we have to realize the statements we make will never change the course to our GOD destination. There are two examples that come to mind from the Bible that really confirm how the statement of our decisions will not change our GOD destination. Come here Jonah. He decided that he was not going to do what GOD called him to do and despite his attempt to escape the assignment by verbally speaking his plan, he still ended on the shore of his GOD destination. Come here Peter... You told JESUS you would not deny him but you did it several time and you curse... But look at you being the disciple you were called to be leading nations to Christ!!! WE can make decision but despite our decisions we will get to the GOD destination. The question remains will you take the 40 year or 40 day journey???

Prayer: Daddy today we come to you to say thank you for being the author and finisher of our life story. We realize that no matter what decisions we make you will get us to Your destination. We thank you for forgiving us in our bad decision making that manifest disobedience, and giving us the opportunity to reach our GOD destination in your grace and mercy. Daddy we shift towards a mindset of obedience and we thank you that no matter what statement we make the result is we win in you. Daddy help stay the course of  your will. Help us warn off distractions that cause your voice to be drowned by the weight of this world and the worries of this life. Remind us Daddy that you are the provider and everything we need can and will be found in you. Daddy help us make the right statements over our life and speak only what you have spoke to us. Help us trust you and help us with our faith in you when things don't look like what we think they should look like. Remind us that your timing is perfect and what you have in store for us is greater than any thing that we could even image or think.  In JESUS Name! AMEN

Passover

Do you know what today is?!? It's  a great day to catch up on the things of GOD and what he is speaking into the earth. So this weekend is really special for the simple fact that today starts the celebration of the Passover. Now let me be honest I never thought I was worthy to celebrate Passover, I really thought it was for the chose people…The Jews, then the Holy Spirit convicted me by reminding me that I was part of the chosen people. Because of the Jesus died on the cross I have been adopted and chosen… Wow! I think sometimes (me especially) we forget that we get to reap the rewards and benefits of the original chosen people. It’s crazy that I have been surrounded by a Jewish family my whole life, thanks to my mom, but I never thought that I was worthy enough to really take part in what they were chosen to do. But thank GOD that his thoughts are not like mine and I have received the insight on the value of what being chosen brings. With all that being said let me just give you the great benefits of the Passover. First know that it starts today at sun down. During this time the Jews would say a blessing and feast together giving thanks for the death angel passing over them because of their obedience of putting the lamb’s blood over their door post. The crazy thing is that this celebration continues until Sunday! Three days of giving thanks and feasting together to celebrate GOD sparing the lives of those that were obedient. Now that you got the background let me get to the benefits. 1. It will cause humbleness to take place in your heart that will open the gates for GOD to move and answer your prayers. 2. Unity will take place. This will cause a movement to really seek after GOD for who he is, not what he has. 3. Healing will take place. So if you having issues in your body or believing GOD for healing for someone else know that this weekend, the manifestation of what you been praying for will happen before your very eyes. 4. You will be overtaken with joy. Yes, the Joy of the LORD will be your strength from this point forward and grow throughout the year. 5. There will be a shifting in the atmosphere. This will open the door to that unmeasurable favor and supernatural things happen for you. In other words, those “But GOD” moments.  6. You will increase in the authority and effectiveness of your prayer time. 6. Revival will spread in your home and destroy any hindrances that may be present. 7. Many people will find their calling and serve in their proper position. So if you are part of the group that feel like they still figuring out their calling or don’t know what it is… Guess what it’s about to be revealed on this weekend. 7. The nations will start to shift. This will start to take effect in the world and we will see the glory of GOD in the nations. 8.You start to live in abundance. That means that the lack in your life will turn into overflow and more than enough. 8. You will find yourself seeking GOD in unique and new ways. In other words, you will be out your comfort zone and “GOD limits.” Now let me be honest I don’t know if I can do a whole weekend of celebration… But I do know that on Sunday I am making an effort to get together as many people I can to break bread together and celebrate this great day. I want to make sure that I and those that are in my Circle of Influence are in a place that we are connected to the benefits of the Passover. To celebrate Passover to me is the best way to tell GOD I am ready to do all the things that come with being an adopted daughter and move in the things you have called your chosen people to do. To read more about the Passover please read 2 Chronicles Chapters 30-31.

Prayer: Daddy as we come to you today to celebrate the benefits of Passover as well as being adopted into your family we first want to thank you. Thank you that no matter what we have done you have a plan for us and that you have called us chosen. Thank you that you give us the opportunity to celebrate you and all you have done for us. Thank you that in you we have our being and that there is nothing that can separate us from your love but our ability to deny it. Thank you that the benefits of being part of your family is not just the ability to talk to you and seek your face, but also to unite with our other family members and break bread together to celebrate the great things you have done for us. Thank you Daddy that on this weekend we get to experience you in a new way and that we will take advantage of the timing and season you have place us in. We love you and thank you for every moment we get to experience you on another level. In Jesus Name! AMEN!!!

The Art of Thankfulness

Good Tuesday Morning!!! I. I was reading my prophetic devotional  and it was talking about about dealing with the anti-Christ but today was really one that convicted me. It was talk about how to use Thanksfulness/Thanksgiving in order to fight and deal with the anti-Christ. Can I be honest I have found it difficult to be thankful when: I am so tired when it comes to my job, my singlehood, and just overall life status. I know the word says in all things give thanks and please know that's my goal and that's why this edition of the devotional convicted me with a passion to ask daddy for a vision of thankfulness. I realize that life will never go the way WE plan but thank GOD his plan is perfect. Thanksgiving and the heart of thanks opens doors for the more enough. When JESUS gave thanks for the five loaves of bread and two fish it went from feeding a little boy and his family to feeding 5,000 and they had leftover to take home. LEFTOVERS!!! Let me just settle right there. When we get to a place of thanksgiving with a thankful heart Daddy will allow us to have leftovers.. In other words the overflow is in your thankfulness. Let's examine one more benefit of thankfulness. It causes Daddy to take on the issues of our heart. Phil.4:6-7" Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus” Not only does thankfulness meet my heart need, but it grants me the peace of GOD, a mindset to trust him in the things of my heart, protect me, and for GOD to make my issue his priority. In the words of my sister oh that preach right there!

Prayer: Daddy so many times we miss the moments to give you thanks dealing with us and our issues. We sit complaining, contemplating, comparing, and coercing things in our life to reflect what we think our life should be when we should be giving you thanks. Daddy forgive us for being in our will when all we had to do is take time and be in yours. Daddy forgive us for not always not having a heart and the speech of thankfulness. Daddy today want to take the time out and say thank. Thank you for being so great to us. Thank you for being our provider, provision, and promise keeper. Thank you for life, healthy, and strength. Thank you for your word that says I am more than a conqueror in you through Christ JESUS. Thank you Daddy that no matter what situation, circumstance, issue, or problem we will thank you first and tell you our heart next. But we will always thank you!! In JESUS NAME. AMEN!!!

A day

Today Daddy is a day I truly wish that I had a mate. Today the sun you created is shinning bright, the temperature is not too hot and the pollen is not at full blast that I can't go outside and enjoy the day. But here I sit daydream of a person that doesn't exist. To be in a position where when he gets off from work we meet up at one of the parks and walk around enjoy great conversation with each other, discussing our future together or even as individuals, and just taking in your great creation. Yet on this day I am inside talking to you about my thoughts. Daughter that sounds great and I hope you know that a day like today with your expectations is not that far away, but why can't we have a day like that? Why can't you take the time out and have a day with your Daddy. I want to tell you about the future plans I have for you. I want to enjoy a conversation of your heart, listening to what you desire, and I give you the instructions on how to get there. Daughter I know on a day like today you seek to have the companionship that I created you to have, but until that day comes, come have a day with me. I may not be there in a natural flesh body but my presence will always place you in a position where you will never feel alone. I can hold your hand and enjoy my creations with you. I really just want a day where we can enjoy our relationship. I know that your heart desires something more and daughter please hold fast to that desire. It is the desire of my plan, but until I get through preparing the moment come walk with me in the park. Come enjoy this day with me. Daddy that sounds great, but I can't see your facial expressions as I discuss the craziness of my life, or hear you laugh at the jokes I try to tell, or even see how you look at me as I look at you. Daughter trust me I understand what you are saying and I have to say is give me the moment to give you the moment you so desire. Know that a day with me can just impacting as one with your mate. I can give you revelation about who I am through my Holy Spirit. I can heal you in just one conversation. I can change your life, create your world, and give you favor, and love on you all at the same time. Daddy I think I like that. I never thought that you could come and be a mate to me in that way. Thank you Daddy for clarity on taking our relationship tp a new level. Daughter you are welcome!!!

With great love and affection,

Your Daddy and true soulmate

The Reality is....

This post is going to be really different because it will be comprise of several things (Dear Future Husband, Transparency, and Daddy Daughter Conversation) For the last three months I have really been in the position of student and learning. About six months ago I ask GOD to start preparing me and surrounding me with the things that a wife would have to face, because I was the position where I really desire the Man of GOD I was designed for. In that prayer I had the opportunity to experience "Wife Lessons." Let me tell you Wife lessons are hard. I mean patience and the ability to hear has been the biggest lesson and teacher during each lesson. I am overwhelm with the revelations that Daddy has given me through every teaching moment. But the biggest lesson came when I found myself in battle in my sleep in my room at night. (Here is me being Transparent) I would find myself fight demotic spirits and one looked like someone I knew. I contact someone I trust that had the spiritual wisdom that I needed to help me understand what was going on. In our conversation she told me that I needed to record every encounter, ask Daddy about it, and realize the pattern of when the attacks happen. Before she could tell me more.. I got the revelation of the why, when, and how they happen. She then told me to explore the root of those areas and when I tell you it didn't take me long to reveal the root. The root came from suppressed insecurity, abandonment, rejection, and giving  my body away. Because every demotic attack was a man. I was overwhelm when I realize that what I thought I was over was really a suppressed moment exposed through these attacks. I did any and everything to make sure that I look like I had it all together, even it meant acting like certain things didn't happen, but the reality is.... What I don't deal with in the natural got exposed in the spiritual and it gave the enemy the permission to come in and do whatever he wanted to do with me. So with all that being said I had to ask Daddy to help me recall every moment that I felt abandon, rejected, given myself away, and let me not forget unforgiveness too which lead to my insecurity. Last night I had to go into my walk in closet and make it my altar calling out everything that the Holy Spirit brought to my mind. From being divorced to being in the position of feel like the only thing that I had to offer a man was my body. I was put on the surgical table to be cut on. I asked for a clean heart and blood transfusion along with freedom. I had to remember that I have freedom in Daddy and there is no chain too strong that can't be broke by him. It's amazing how suppressed things will find themselves exposed no matter how much you try to keep them in. Because I was able to be place on the altar of sacrifices I now have begun to feel the freedom that Daddy promises us. It's awesome but it's just a piece of what I can have and I plan on having in all areas of my life. (Dear  Future Husband)

Dear Future Husband:

I realize that every time I fuss at you for your short comings I am actually frustrated with my own suppressed emotions. The ones that I feel if I present them to you, you will see me in a light that is unpleasing to you. That you will no longer see your priceless jewel, but see broken pieces of colored glass. But after laying on Daddy's altar and presenting my body on his surgical table, he cut me open and replace my heart with his and gave me a blood transfusion that cause me to regain joy and my place in him. No longer am I upset at my short comes and no longer am I striving towards perfection but excellence. I apologize for all the times I made you feel less than a man. I apologize for making you feel like you failed me. Know that there is nothing in this world that you can do to fail me unless you stop listening to Daddy. You are my rock, you are the natural representation of GOD's love towards me. You are his heart in the flesh. Thank you for always being so patient and forgiving. I realize that this nothing new for you, that you were prepared for this very moment because Daddy told you it was coming. But that doesn't meant that I can't correct my actions. I thank you for being so great and open with me every step up the way. Today as Daddy has open my heart I expose my all to you. I realize that this should have been done before now, but you knew that I would come to you sooner than later with all of my brokenness healed. Thank you for being my heart beat when I didn't see how to love you beyond my flaws. Thank you for being the covering that you were destine to be for me. The tears that I cry right now are not of hurt and frustration any more, but gratitude and joy. I am totally grateful that you know the value of us and me. That my price in your heart never devalues but continues to gain value. I love you so much.

With a healed heart,

Your Priceless Jewel

Prayer: Daddy this was the most difficult revelation about me that I have ever had to face in a while. To know that I was in a place of bondage thinking I was free. Daddy thank you for a husband who can pray for my brokenness and not walk away as though there is not hope. Thank you for a man who sees beyond my flaws and see my freedom. Father right now I expose my flaws, heart, and mind to you. Find all the areas of insecurities in my life and cover them in the blood and destroying them with your love. For you said in your word that I fearfully and wonderfully made in you. Daddy expose every areas of doubt that I have suppressed just to fake joy. You said that I should be anxious for nothing. That you have taken on every burden that I may experience your everlasting joy. Jesus you said that you came that I can have life and life more abundantly and I accept the abundance of  life today. Daddy take away the areas of rejection that I have kept a secrete for you said in your word that your plans for my life are good and perfect. That you knew me before I was even a thought in my mother's womb. Daddy make me whole again. You said that you are my healer, that in you I can find rest and refuge. Daddy right now I ask that every broken area and piece of me be whole in you. Thank you that the blood of your son Jesus make me new in you and your grace covers me daily. Daddy thank you for being my father. For loving me in spite of. I thank you that you will never allow anything to harm me. I bind up every attack, assignment, and ambush of the enemy that is in the works, working, and thinking about manifesting in the name of Jesus and with his blood I send them all to the pit of hell. I thank you father that ever witch, war lock, demotic spirit, or imp is bound in the the name of Jesus and sent to the pit of hell and every opening, window, door, gateway, foot hold, crack, and cranny that the enemy is trying to come through has been sealed with the blood of JESUS and that the freedom of you has been released. Thank you Daddy for freedom and the healing of self inflicted wounds. Daddy I rest in your freedom, I speak your joy, I represent your glory and I thank you for your peace. In JESUS NAME AMEN  

I Got The Help

I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord,

the Maker of heaven and earth (Ps121: 1-2NIV)

It amazes me that there are so many times in my life where I am like I need help. Whether it's getting my life together, making life changing decisions, or just dealing with other people I always scream HELP!! And if you are like me, Daddy is the last person you go to when you need help. You may call a friend, sibling, parent, mentor, co-worker... Anybody but Daddy and why is this? The Psalmist ask the question where does my help come from then he answers:"It comes  from the LORD the maker of the heaven and earth." Well that makes sense... Why are we asking for help from people who didn't even create the situation or solution to what we need help with. Why are we on goggle or bing look for the answer or solution to the situation, when we can easily access the Father? Here is my answer to that question, because Daddy will give us an answer we don't want to hear. When we ask for help many times we are in desperate need to get an answer or a resolution to the situation. We don't want to deal with a process or a waiting period, waiting may be the thing we need help with so why give me the lesson on waiting? But that's Daddy, he want's us to learn the process of his help and this may mean waiting, or going through various steps. It may mean do something out of our comfort zone or even something we know nothing about. It may simple mean trusting him knowing that wherever he leads or tells us to do will get us to a place of being rescued. We must realize that when we seek help from anything or any one other than Daddy we are setting ourselves up for failure, because we are depending on something or someone that can't create help. The are giving us help based on experience or due to the experience of other sources that have dealt with similar or same situations, but is is not accurate help.  Daddy supplies help that he may have to create or help that may not be visible to the the nature eye.

Prayer:  Daddy right now we need your help! We know that many times when we ask for help we seek the help of others or things, but today Daddy we seek your help. We lift our heads and eyes to heaven looking up to you, seeking your presence and ready to receive your wisdom. We surrender our cry for help to you. Daddy help us to wait, help us through the steps, help us through the process, give us the confidence to hold our heads up when we are feeling down. Help us to trust you more, increase our faith, open our hearts to receive your instructions, and help us to lean and depend on you and you alone.  Help us to hear your voice, help us to recognize your presence in difficult and chaotic times. Daddy today we scream HELP US DADDY!!! In Jesus Name. AMEN